7 Important Tips for Divorced Parents for Back to School

This is a sponsored post, although all thoughts and opinions are those of our own.

I’m not sure all of my readers know or not, but early last year the marriage to my high school sweetheart ended. We got divorced, and it was not only hard on myself, but our daughters too. Since I was a stay at home mom, and part-time blogger, I had to start my whole life over. I was so bitter over the situation. I didn’t really know how to co-parent without being so angry, but I had to put my best foot forward and do it for my children.

Are divorced parents doing right by their children?

Transitions are always difficult for divorced families. And the start of a new school year is no exception. There are many details to handle, and for parents (especially for those who have separated or divorced over the summer), the stress and confusion is even greater.

Family attorney Michael Ian Bender served for many years as a Judge for Chicago’s Circuit Court of Cook County in the domestic relations division. Back in private practice, he’s received numerous queries concerning “back-to-school” co-parenting challenges.

“Developing a solid co-parenting plan for the school year is an absolute must,” says Bender. “Both parents and children need to be on the same page and know what to expect to avoid unnecessary conflict and anxiety.”

With this in mind, Bender has developed an essential back to school “To Do” list for co-parents, which he would be happy to share with your listeners.

I have 7 important tips for divorced parents to follow for back to school for their children.

Update the School

Take time before school starts to reach out to the school and explain the family situation. Make yourself available to answer any questions they may have and let your children know that the teachers and school administrators are aware.

Start an Online Shared Calendar

There are many activities that occur within the school year and it’s hard for everyone to keep up and stay organized. A shared calendar can be a perfect solution, so both parents (and children, if age appropriate) know the schedule and can plan accordingly.

Arrange for Duplicate Notifications

Although information should always be shared between the parents, it helps to arrange for separate, duplicate notifications about academic progress and school activities, so one parent is not responsible for copying and sending information to the other.

Review and Split the Supply List

There’s no need for both parents to run out and start buying school supplies. Review the list and agree to split it up so the children can accompany one parent for the first 10 items, and go with the other parent for the remaining 10.

Drop the Kids Off Together

The first day of school can be a scary, overwhelming experience for even the most confident of kids. If at all possible, both parents should free up their schedules to be there together and show their support. If you can’t be there together, take a photo and send it to the ex.

Keep Consistent House Rules

When the children are splitting their time between both parents’ homes, it’s important for the “house rules” to be consistent at both residences, especially during the school year. If bedtime on school nights is 8:00 pmat one parent’s home, then it must be the same at the ex’s.

Attend Parent-Teacher Conferences Together

While this may be difficult, it’s so important to attend parent-teacher conferences as a team. It sends a strong message to the children that no matter what happened in the past, today you are united and have your child’s best interest at heart.

Here’s a great clip to listen to involving divorced parents and children:
https://soundcloud.com/daniel-french-230732811/judge-michael-bender-big-changes-for-some-kids-at-back-to-school

All of these are so very important, and I’ve tried to implement them all with my ex, although a lot of them are a bit harder for me, because my ex-husband moved 500 miles away. We do keep in contact about all of the school information and of course about our children. Co-parenting isn’t always the easiest thing to do, but in all reality it is FOR THE CHILDREN, and you need to set an example for THEM. This isn’t about you or your ex anymore.

Make sure you check out http://benderlawchicago.com/ and https://www.linkedin.com/in/michael-ian-bender-baa0a98a/ as his ideas were the main reason for the topic of this article for my readers.

Have you dealt with divorce or separation? If so, do you have any suggestions on how to co-parent for your children even though it may be difficult?

Disclosure: Everything Mommyhood received compensation for this posting. All thoughts and opinions are those of our own and were not influenced in any way. If you’d like to see your product/service/company featured on Everything Mommyhood, please email us at EverythingMommyhood@gmail.com

Comments

  1. Shannon Hanks says:

    Darci, I work with families every week about this very subject. I am in no endorsing the app but several clients have said the app Cozi is awesome for co-parenting as they can add whoever they want to the account. Members of the family each get their own color code so when important events are added it updates all the family members phones. The only downside they have reported is that it only works on smartphones not the slider-phones.

  2. Armando Rincon says:

    Important things to teach families in this situations ,there are no books on this. you learn with life but nowadays we even have people dedicated to this.

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